You've reached the non-existent website of Lawrence Salberg.
Your choices are to email him. Or not.
His email address is in this format: firstname @ websitedomain.com. If you are struggling with what that means exactly, it's likely it's best you don't email him. Instead continue using Facebook and maybe one day he will join you there.
If you are his friend, you might have his phone number. Try that if you must. But must you?
If you know where he lives, knock on his door during daylight hours.
Or as previously mentioned, you can email him. Learn about email below.
Email is amazing.
Email is not dead.
You can send lots of text in a single email.
You can also share other things: photos, files, links to things on the internet that you think Lawrence will like.
Things that Email can not do
By sending Lawrence an email, you do not sign up to forever to see his 'feed'. You will not be made aware of his meals, or the photos of those meals. You will not get 'notifications' about his life automatically.
Email also does not let you automatically share your relationship with Lawrence with 500 other people. Only you and he will know about your email communications. You will not be able to easily influence thousands of people by making pithy remarks in your emails to Lawrence. Depending on your life goals, your time may not be well spent by emailing Lawrence.
If you use a paid email provider, like Fastmail, you also can not use your or Lawrence's emails to you to help you be aware of products and services that companies might try and sell you by scanning words in your communication. If you must have this 'feature', try Gmail.
You will not be able to see if Lawrence 'liked' your message to him. He also can not see if you 'liked' his message to you. If you must share that sentiment, you will have to write a new email.
Likewise, you will not be able to see when, or if, Lawrence even read your email. Even if you try to use tracking images with certain email services, Lawrence uses a setting that prevents images from auto-loading, and he is unlikely to turn that on for you. This also means that Lawrence can not see when, or if, you read his message to you. The only way to know for sure is to reply to an email.
- Does Lawrence Salberg have a nifty website or blog where I can learn more about him and discover everything he likes and doesn't like?
- Not really. He does have other websites, but he doesn't share much about those things on the internet.
- Does Lawrence Salberg believe in using nicer fonts than these? They are ugly.
- He does believe in using nicer fonts, but not here. Because ugly can be pretty.
- I want to follow Lawrence Salberg on the internet. How do I do that?
- Social media is for companies to sell you things, disturb your peace with notifications, allow governments to track you (and maybe one day detain you), and for children and those who previously used AOL. You can follow Lawrence Salberg in person, but it will cost you time and gas, and result in a lot of boredom.
- This website is annoying. I want to be able to click around and "discover" lots of "interesting content". Where are the menus and sidebars?
- We only have plain text here. We lost the menus in the battle of 6502 and the sidebar fell off when we took a sharp left turn 8086 miles ago.
- This took me some time to find. Why isn't this website more search-engine friendly?
- Because the search engines aren't friendly to us. We are hiding in plain sight, the only hip SEO strategy for the decade of 2020. But in a throwback to 1990, we did do some keyword stuffing if you want to peek at it.
- I'm definitely not going to bookmark this website.
- That's not a question. Plus, only cool people use bookmarks. Maybe you should instead share this website on four social networks and ignore people in real life, stop reading real books, and do meditation to make up for it.
- Where do I leave a comment? I have thoughts about this webpage and want to let other visitors know my thoughts.
- This page is full. You can use the slim amount of space left on the internet to make your own webpage and write your thoughts there. Sadly, other visitors to this page will not see your thoughts, so it's like checking out a library book where you you don't know the thoughts of the people who read it before you. It's rough, but apparently it works for third-graders on up, so maybe it'll work for you. You can try to learn about making your own webpage here.
All remaining frequently asked questions are answered here.
Some Cool Links
For Hacker Norton: These are not the links you're looking for.
For everyone else: If you didn't email me, click on one of these links to leave.
- Defintions of Web-related terms: The best thing on Mozilla's Developer Network.
- Fastmail: Get some real email. Please. Else, this.
- This is a webpage: It's just words and not much else.
- The Plain Text Definition: Like the U.S. Consitution, you should read this and try to understand it.
- The Plain Text Project: Everything you need to know about text. Except the link above, which you should read and try to understand.
- Plaintext Productivity: The first site that made me think about why I wasted a decade playing with a mouse and suffering through 100+ graphical user interfaces to try and be productive.
- iA Writer: The best way to write text on a Mac. If you don't have a Mac, try this.
- Just Use Spreadsheets: Imaginary site I think should exist to encourage people to just use spreadsheets and stop signing up for apps for every tiny thing under the sun. If you build this site, please email me so I can point the link to your cool site.
- Why You Should Stop Reading News: Self-explanatory.
- Disconnect: A short read by the founder of CD Baby